When youre born in America, you get a front row seat. George Carlin, 48. googletag.pubads().setTargeting("grsession", "osid.b75ee1b4ab41ae6cecc3e4c769a5b3df"); Those who dance are considered insane by those who cannot hear the music. He was a true outspoken man that we can emulate in many ways. But there is an I in independence, individuality, andintegrity. George Carlin, If its true that our species is alone in the universe, then Id have to say the universe aimed rather low and settled for very little. George Carlin, The caterpillar does all the work, but the butterfly gets all the publicity. George Carlin, Men are from Earth, women are from Earth. Trying to be happy by accumulating possessions is like trying to satisfy hunger by taping sandwiches all over your body. Carlin was noted for his black comedy and his thoughts on politics, the English language, psychology, religion, and various taboo subjects. if (window.csa) { 383 talking about this. he must of been a brilliant man mostly misunderstood by most people wish i would of met him in person one on one, 51 Best John Muir Quotes On Nature, Mountains, Trees, 50 To Kill A Mockingbird Atticus Quotes With Page Numbers, Happy Birthday Nephew Images With Quotes, Wishes, Messages, Happy Birthday Daughter Images With Quotes, Wishes, Messages, Good Morning Happy Monday Images With Quotes, Wishes, Cute & Romantic Happy Birthday Love Images For Him, Her, Happy Birthday Dog Images With Quotes For Your Puppy, Happy Birthday Niece Images With Wishes, Messages, Quotes, Depression Quotes Images | Feeling Sad Pictures, Wallpaper, Happy Birthday Son Images With Quotes, Wishes, Messages, Happy Birthday Husband Images With Quotes, Wishes, Messages For Hubby, Good Morning Quotes Images To Make Your Day Beautiful. The planet is fine. I love individuals. Its so fuckin heroic. George Carlin, 18. What are your favorite George Carlin quotes? I sincerely believe that if you think theres a solution, youre part of the problem. They will only bring you down to their level and beat you with experience." - George Carlin 2. Religion is like a pair of shoesFind one that fits for you, but dont make me wear your shoes. Required fields are marked *. Everything He ever makesdies.George Carlin, Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?George Carlin, Thats why they call it the American Dream because you have to be asleep to believe it.George Carlin, May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house.George Carlin, Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.George Carlin, There are nights when the wolves are silent and only the moon howls. Its never just a game when youre winning.George Carlin, If 4 out of 5 people SUFFER from diarrheadoes that mean that 1 enjoys it?George Carlin, Isnt it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do practice?George Carlin, Religion is like a pair of shoes..Find one that fits for you, but dont make me wear your shoes.George Carlin, Religion is just mind control. }); American Lets get started! If holy people are so interested in politics, government, and public policy, let them pay the price of admission like everybody else. We have the war on crime, the war on cancer, the war on drugs. Religion has convinced people that there's an invisible man living in the sky. Hope these quotes will give you a different perspective on government and how it works. Most people with low self-esteem have earned it. George Carlin, 29. Its what our system produces: Garbage in, garbage out. About Us | Privacy Policy | Terms | Contact Us, Ronald Reagan Religious Quotes To Live Your Life As A True Believer, www.brainyquote.com/authors/george-carlin-quotes, www.quotes.thefamouspeople.com/george-carlin-1484.php, www.everydaypower.com/george-carlin-quotes. googletag.pubads().setTargeting("gr_author", "false"); Disclaimer: As an Amazon Associate We earn from qualifying purchases. He Was Fatally Beaten by Memphis Police Now People Around the World Are Sharing #SunsetsForTyre in His Honor, 41 Daughter Quotes That Will Touch and Melt Your Heart, 20 Most Inspiring Martin Luther King Jr. Carlin was noted for his black comedy and his thoughts on politics, the English language, psychology, religion, and various taboo subjects. In America, anyone can become president. gads.async = true; As for the poor, they tell us theyve lost all incentive because weve given them too much money. People cant seem to get it through their heads that there is never any healing or closure. Witty George Carlin Quotes 1. Planet, species, race, nation, state, religion, party, union, club, association, neighborhood improvement committee; I have no interest in any of it. And a list of people theyre going to visit at 3am. Theres only the immediate future and the recent past. Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac? var cookie = cookies[i]; Thats the problem.George Carlin, Let a smile be your umbrella, and youll end up with a face full of rain. "Boy everyone in this country is running around yammering about their fucking rights. If black boxes survive air crashes why dont they make the whole plane out of that stuff? George Carlin, 55. Lists. The planet is fine. George Carlin is a Grammy-winning American stand-up comedian, actor, and author. Tell people theres an invisible man in the sky who created the universe, and the vast majority will believe you. Everyone should try to scratch their name on the bomb of life. George Carlin, 5. ", Follow AzQuotes on Facebook, Twitter and Google+. Aw, hes a comedian. If the parent corporation doesn't want you to know something, it won't be on the news. They own, and control the corporations. We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often. 4. var ue_furl = "fls-na.amazon.com"; This is what we have to offer. The challenge is to find it. George Carlin, 17. Because you have the illusion of choice! George Carlin, 76. One good reason to only maintain a small circle of friends is that three out of four murders are committed by people who know the victim. George Carlin, 51. George Carlin Inspirational George Carlin Quotes 1. } A flag is supposed to represent everything that a country does. And fight songs. You know why? If its true that our species is alone in the universe, then Id have to say the universe aimed rather low and settled for very little. To me, authority is something that a freer spirit, a more independent mind, and a person who can handle the world, doesnt need guidance from. I look at war a little. I'm the Founder of SucceedFeed.com and I truly appreciate you taking the time to read my posts and being apart of the Succeed Feed community. "ObfuscatedMarketplaceId": "A1PQBFHBHS6YH1" Heres all you have to know about men and women: women are crazy, men are stupid. You caused the problem; you voted them in; you have no right to complain, All the media and the politicians ever talk about is things that separate us, things that make us different from one another, "It's harder to be funny from the position of power. Electricity is really just organized lightning. George Carlin, 20. And the main reason women are crazy is that men are stupid. Carlin certainly aimed to provoke, but its the why and how of it that made him so exceptional. ' George Carlin, 56. q("f", arguments) If you cant beat them, arrange to have them beaten. George Carlin, 47. Some people have to go to work and dont have time for all that. George Carlin, 24. My first rule: I don't believe anything the government tells me. Men are often so foolish as to boast and value themselves upon their passions, even those that are most vicious. George Carlin was posthumously awarded the Mark Twain Prize for American Humor in 2008, after he passed away that year at the age of 71. Tell them what you've painted is wet, they have to touch it to believe. Trying to be happy by accumulating possessions is like trying to satisfy hunger by taping sandwiches all over your body. George Carlin, 45. George Carlin, Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointed idealist.George Carlin, I, myself, have killed six people. Your email address will not be published. A comedian can say things that you may not want to hear but need to. Think of how stupid the average person is, and then realize that half of them are stupider than that. stylesheet.href = url; window.csa("Events")("setEntity", { // page settings Nobody owns anything. My first rule: I don't believe anything the government tells me. googletag.pubads().enableAsyncRendering(); init: function() { Every now and then you find yourself in a different place. But once youre born, youre on your own. When you're born you get a ticket to the freak show. He's the subject of a new documentary. If you can find a solution to homelessness where the corporations and politicians can make a few million dollars each, you will see the streets of America begin to clear up pretty damn quick! George Carlin, 67. Born: May 12, 1937. George Carlin was no stranger to controversy. [CDATA[ "George Carlin confronts reality". If it requires a uniform, its a worthless endeavor. George Carlin, 11. Tom, Id like you to meet the girl of my dreams, Tragedy. These days, Trajedi. George Carlin,Brain Droppings, It turned out I was pretty good in science. A house is just a place to keep your stuff while you go out and get more stuff. George Carlin, 16. Some people see things that are, and ask, why? } Maybe this time itll work. In America, anyone can become president. Political correctness is Americas newest form of intolerance, and it is especially pernicious because it comes disguised as tolerance. I often warn people: Somewhere along the way, someone is going to tell you, There is no I in team. What you should tell them is, Maybe not. Period. Im not sure silencing people or forcing them to alter their speech is the best method for solving problems that go much deeper than speech. "https://":"http://";i+=f?g:k;i+=j;i+=h;c(i)}if(!e.ue_inline){if(a.loadUEFull){a.loadUEFull()}else{b()}}a.uels=c;e.ue=a})(window,document); Think of how stupid the average person is, and then realize that half of them are stupider than that. George Carlin, 40. // Who watches everything you do every minute of every day. They should be more vivid. And the invisible man has a list of ten specific things he doesn't want you to do. The politicians are put there to give you the idea that you have freedom of choice. The challenge is to find it. The larger the group, the more toxic, the more of your beauty as an individual you have to surrender for the sake of group thought. 4994. George Carlin Quotes Government : "Most of the government wants to control information and language so that it can control you. function q(c, r) { You do drugs, alcohol, you party, you get ready for high school. The game is rigged and nobody seems to notice. Some people have no idea what theyre doing, and a lot of them are really good at it. George Carlin, 42. It doesnt only represent the good things. If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done? "Some people have no idea what they're doing, and a lot of them are really good at it." ~ (George Carlin). var node = document.getElementsByTagName("script")[0]; - George Carlin profile quotes. George Carlin "The planet is fine. And I didnt really care in the first place.George Carlin, Dont confuse me with those who cling to hope. var url; Life is not measured by the breaths you take, but by the moments that take your breaths away. He loves you and he needs money. pubID: '3211', adServer: 'googletag', bidTimeout: 4e3, params: { aps_privacy: '1YN' } Because theres no money in that problem. Carlin is well-known for pivoting from a strait-laced, suit-and-tie approach to standup in the late 1960s and early . We made 'em up. var source = getCookieWithoutJQuery("source"); Some people dream of things that never were, and ask, why not? George Carlin Shitting on Government for 8 Minutes Straight LaughPlanet 900K subscribers Subscribe 42K 1.3M views 2 years ago #GeorgeCarlin #Comedy #America George Carlin Shitting on Government. Some people see the glass half full, others see it half empty. Property is theft. If you vote and you elect dishonest, incompetent people into office who screw everything up, you are responsible for what they have done. // Smith Brothers Funeral Home Nashville, Tn Obituaries, 11303160ac6407d94bac118 How Much Were Diamonds Worth In 1900, Weber Kettle Models, Ojai Turtle Conservancy Airbnb, Joe Louis Training Routine, Articles G